Why are handjobs necessary in class?
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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