"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize