She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
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