Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Randomize