I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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