I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
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