so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
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If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
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Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
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