so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
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he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
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You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
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