So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
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He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
Randomize