If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
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