I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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