I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
How external is "for external use only"?
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
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