New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Randomize