she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
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he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
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'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
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