you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
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