It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize