i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
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I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
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I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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