Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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