who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
The upside of Thirsty Thursdaying with the client last night was that he was so hungover that he didn't want to spend time wrangling over the contract extension this morning.
Boss just said I'm getting a bonus for this. Want to celebrate our anniversary a week early tonight?
This is why I married you.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
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