You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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