There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Randomize