I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
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I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
My butt remains clenched, sir.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize