So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
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