Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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