if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize