I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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