so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
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