Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Randomize