First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
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