Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
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