I think I died a long time ago.
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
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