I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize