so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
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