I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Randomize