How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
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i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
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I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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