I'm so fucking centered right now
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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