What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
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