i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Randomize