Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize