she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
You ruined the universe
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