I'm sorry my penis didn't work
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
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