I don't usually arrange sex via text message
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
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