Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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