Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize