$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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