just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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