She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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