I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize