I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
You smell like stripper and shame
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
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