fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
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